JD: This next match is a special one, ladies and gentlemen. Please welcome our guest, Robbie “Umbra” Ellison, who’s going to darken the arena.
DM: You might ask why we’re doing this. This match is gonna be so fast, and over so quickly, if you could watch it, you would know the winner before you ever figured out what happened.
JD: But don’t worry, we’ve spared no expense. For tonight’s match we have the world’s largest screens (Four huge, wall-size LCDs descend from the ceiling.) so that you can watch the match, blow-by-blow, larger than life!
DM: JJ, these screens are so big, the Guinness people are here!
JD: Here comes Project Hestia’s own Rodrigo "Hustle" Alvarez. As you may have heard, Hustle was recently named the Houston Tornado after defending the Mayor from a vicious Teragen attack.
DM: He’s still a young kid, but definitely showing some promise.
JD: And from the other side of the arena, Punit “Fastball” Rao, a whirling “tornado” of speed himself.
DM: Fastball is a tough fighter, hardened on the streets. We’ll see how Hustle stands up to him.
JD: Umbra has darkened the arena, and we’re ready to start.
(A bell rings, and is followed by a deafening explosion of sound, then silence.)
DM: We’ve been signaled that the match is now over. Let’s watch that replay on the big screen.
JD: Whoa! I thought this thing was gonna be in slow-motion.
DM: It is, JoJo; however, these guys are just that fast.
JD: And now they’re into it. They’ve vying for position, trading punches with each, but each of them is successfully dodging out of the way.
DM: Look at those moves now. Hustle is spinning through the air, landing blows in all directions, almost as if he’s suspended in mid-air.
JD: Man, Dusty, even the big
DM: It’s a surprise, but Hustle’s clearly dominating this match. Fastball’s got the skills, but he just can’t get off the defensive.
JD: It’s amazing. If you look at this picture of Hustle from just two weeks ago, he’s obviously been training hard. All that baby-fat is gone, replaced by lean, hard muscle.
DM: It looks like Hustle knew he was gonna have to pull out all the stops for this fight, and by gosh, he did.
JD: Did you just see that move?! Even in slow-motion, it looks like Hustle was in two places at once.
DM: What’s Fastball doing now? Just swinging in the air?
JD: No. That must be the sound we heard earlier, his signature Fastball Surprise. He’s breaking the sound barrier with each of those swings.
DM: Well, it’s definitely caught Hustle by surprise, and look at those blows. Fastball’s laying into him now.
JD: But he’s recovered quickly, and now it looks like he wants to end this. He’s going in for the killing blows.
DM: Look at that JJ! He’s phased right through Fastball, and finished him with an elbow to the back of the head! Match to Hustle!
JD: There’s gonna be a lot of unhappy bookies in Vegas tonight. No one thought he was gonna pull this one off.
DM: Hustle looked like he was barely a
JD: The darkness is up, and there’s Hustle now, playing to the crowd.
DM: And the crowd loves it. They’re going wild for this guy.
JD: What a fight ladies and gentleman. And to think it was only 10 seconds long. You’re gonna spend longer than that with this next commercial break.
The Speed Match
